My Goal is....

to make you laugh.. =D???.. should I dye my hair??

What use to be and now...

"Natasha completed the quiz
"Which book of the Bible are
you?" with the result Ecclesiastes.
You're a hardheaded realist burned once too often
by the flaws of others and the emptiness of what society calls "success." Your
wisdom comes from the school of hard knocks, which makes you a great advisor.
You can't stand fake sunniness and social climbing; you're true, even if you're
a little blue. Your eyes are clear, so without denying the reality of evil, make
sure you also look at the goodness that's taking place around you. "
.

As you can see I took a quiz on 'which book in the Bible am I'.. just for fun on facebook, (yup, trust me to do this kind of quiz instead of all the other silly ones).. what made me do it? well firstly, the title looks interesting, secondly I was curious on how the end results would look like..

Surprisingly it was not bad.. not bad at all, (this is because some quiz gives really weird answers ) Ecclesiates ey? when I was reading it at first I felt like.. NO! this is so not me.. then you know, when you start to question yourself and wonder.. you start to justify what kind of person WHO you SAY YOU ARE.. for me it was I am a happy person! I like sunniness and trees!

Then, you know how your train of thoughts just wonders and that train starts to blow steams from the past?.. I look back and yeah.. maybe I am a hard headed realist.. its true, I have been through alot in my whole 19 yrs living in this world. Mature I am, seeing, learning and experincing things that could make any person go crazy if they were living in my shoes.. at a very young age my sisters and I learn that the 'common rule in life' doesnt really apply to anyone.. we learn that not all grown ups are good and trustworthy people, Family members arent necessarily going to be loyal to you, and that money may not bring happiness but it gives you peace of mind.

All those I've learn at a tender age of 7. oh yeah, Im not boasting if say at that age I may have been more mature than any 20 year old at that time.. You see, I sometimes see age as nothing but a number and I can understand the logic of the longer you live the more you experince things, of course its true but only to a certain degree. Everyone goes through problems in life but I belive the only difference is the capacity of it all. I am not ignorant to how crazy the world has become this pass century and how suffering is no laughing matter. But all I can say is everytime I meet a person I try not to judge because I know that everyone is fighting their own battle, some stronger than others.

Yes, coming back to the quiz, its weird how words are connected right? how I jump shift thinking, that being a realist is being mature, and to like all the sunniness is being immature per se.. but what I am tiring to say is maybe it is true the first half but I belive that I have already pass the looking into the good side of the world. Another level of spiritual maturity I suppose. I believe God has brought about change in my life, guess thats why I appriciate the observer part of me.

So, its not immaturity that makes me happy when the sun comes out, or enjoying people's laughther and tiring to find 'good' in everything I see.. it is the outcome of being fed up of being a negative realist. Isn't it interesting how a quiz can make me think.. haha, just for fun try it but dont take it too seriously.. am I contradicting myself?

A friendly reminder..

"Either the Bible will keep you away from Sin, Or Sin
will keep you away from the Bible"
(anonymous)

The Mirror and the bed

Happy? Content?.. at peace with yourself.. comfortable.. how do you know if you really are Happy-content-at peace and comfortable with youreslf?.. how do know if that smile on your face is really genuine? How do you wake up in the morning feeling ready to face the world and go to sleep without any regrets?.. are you really who others see you as?

The Mirror and the Bed.. both have special meanings to me..

The Mirror- You can be the most good looking person on earth. The Smartest. The most Popular. The Riches. but if you cannot make the person in the mirror look back at you and be proud of all the things you have done.. then happiness per se is not found..

The Bed- To sleep, is to be at peace. To rest your mind..To rest, is a daily act of surrendering.. no force is involve. If you cannot sleep in peace, if you cannot surrender , you are not at rest.. therefore you are not comfortable.. happiness in freedom again is not found...


Me being me, like looking at things in different ways.. oh yeah.. isnt it amazing how these two objects are found in our rooms.. In our own private place.. these two things that see's us in a way no one else does.. Hypocrite detectors I would like to call them.. =)..How the first thing you see is the mirror and the last place you end up is on your bed.. You look in the mirror.. you reflect back on your bed..

So ask yourself.. are you proud of the way you have been living? can you
look in the mirror? Can you say all this while your prayers at night are
sincere.?.

The INGERISH

Sometimes, the english language makes me laugh.. so much so, that this pass few days I have been gathering some common phrases in the english world (those who have me in their facebook, would understand =D).. anyway.. these are a few sentences that we normally use that sometimes does not make sense.. plus some smart come backs that you wish you could say..

1) Not back yet?.. well obviously, me standing here is just another fragment of your imagination..
2) Are you all right?.. No, Its just normal for me to tear up when I accidently stab my toe...
3) I know exactly how you feel... well, to say exactly is abit impossible, counting on the place and the time, and how things happen..
4) You look sick.. gee thanks, as if me coughing and sneezing my brains out was not obvious enough..
5).. it actually means... so if it actually means that, than why doesn't it just say that??

Paradoxically English

English is a very peculiar language that I will grant

E.g. there’s no ham in hamburger or egg in the eggplant

Many foreign visitors never quite manage to grapple

With the fact that there is no pine or apple in a pineapple

English muffins were not invented in England in fact

And French fries were not invented in France to be exact

But if foreigners can’t understand us I don’t give a fig

If a guinea pig is not from Guinea and its not even a pig

So what if Quicksand takes you down slowly, who cares?

And does it matter if the Boxing rings are really squares

Copyright © Paul Curtis. All Rights Reserved

A new perspective.. thanks to manda.. aiyo..

I'm no movie critic.. just someone who enjoys watching movies. i like Movies that can make you learn something new about the world, looking through life in another person's eyes, or movies that tell you a story about the a world that you never imagine.. . haha.. anyway, no, dont lable it as indie films.. I like all sort of movie, as long as it can grab my attention.. I enjoy comedy, sad ones with hallmarks moments that makes you cry ten thousand times, war movies, dark comedies, cartoon.. but honestly I am more of a fan for 'its a hard life but you are not alone' kind of movies, some would call it harsh but I call it a good reality check.. part of me thinks, my liking towards movie like this , is mean.. it makes me feel guilty. Just another audience, in front of the tv.. sitting on my couch, comfortable.. while infront of me is someone is who is suffering.. especially movies tht are claimed to be based on real life experience.. part of me wish it is just another media gimmick.. just to add more spice into the soup (yeah, quote me).. than, looking back on the wish.. I feel even more guilty for denying someone's strength... you, see, my complex mind, just goes on wondering, what if's?, should have, could have, would have, but when life gets tough.. I switch off the tv, put the dvd in the case and life goes on..for me... because I cant do anything else..

anyway, last night Manda and i watched a movie called 'The Kite Runner', yes another one of those, books turn movie.. and yes the movie did justice to the book. Its about loyalty, friendship and second chances.. yes, another one of those movies tht is base on real life..with a smack of reality and whole lot of feelings.I cried like there was no tommorrow.. It aroused many emotions, guilt, pain, happiness, anger and disgust.. questions like how could the world be so 'evil', why do bad things happen to good people.. I would go as far as.. how could God allow this?.. yes to the point of sleepless night, to the point where I look at myself and ask God, if i could make one person life a little less painful, I want in.. If u have not seen or read it.. make sure u do it, but If you are the kind tht cant handle pain.. maybe its not for you

A new prespective?.. if I ever have a son, i would never let him walk alone. I would send him for Karate lessons.. I would teach him how to defend himself properly and forget about being macho, if he is in trouble he should be brave enough to shout for help!

Here's to a new start

Its not the situation that makes the person, but its the choice we make - (Tacha, in the toilet, 11:4opm .. yeah quote me)..