1st March.. 2008

Today is Michelle Hellen's 2nd anniversary.. it has been 2 years since we last saw her.. I can never forget this day..The day, My Best Friend passed away.. so many memories with her good times,bad times,happy times and sad times .. she was known for her happy Go lucky attitude, her wild curly hair, her skill at talking back and her unbearable jokes.. Haha.. Miss u Michelle..She was the one person In my life who I trully trust with all my secrects..my goals and my fears..No one can compare the trust tht i share with Michelle. Grace and I believe tht she is our Guardian Angel.. The life tht she lived was one tht impacted many.. Every morning you could see a smile on her face.. haha.. known as her photogenic smile.. ppl are easily attracted to her because of tht.. Today Grace and I did our usual routine.. by flowers at Bdc.. then visit her grave.. light 6 candels and say a prayer in our heart..

Extra day...

I was about to post up a Happy post.. but something happen.. a phone call tht just frustrated me.. I am reminded again about God's love and mercy to sinners.. How he could still forgive and love hypocrites, murderers, backstabbers and gossipers... WHY?? because no one is perfect.. i am reminded again.. My trust is slowy fading away frm the world.. My sisters are my rock.. Blood is thicker tht water.. trust me i know.. i wish i was one of those who would venge out their anger but i cant.. i choose not to.. i want to try to understand the situation.. its not worth our friendship.. trust me again.. I know.. I let go of a friend once in order to keep my promise to another.. Now i miss tht friend soo much.. but I dont regret.. STOP the GOSSIp.. IS it so hard to just to sit, listen AND a not tell?? if ur wondering why nobody wants to tell u abt anything.. myb this is why.. look at yourself.. in the car listening.. the story tht i told was to glorify God's name and yet u chose to listen about who was invole and u chose to tell only tht part to the world.. remember God looks into one's intention.. ask yourself again.. who is tht person with? are they together? why wont she/he tell me???.. i'll ask u this.. can they trust you?..

The good old days..

my 16th bday.. 2006

merdeke..2006

haha.. it has been such along time since my friends and i all went out.. I really miss them.. this week I made a promise to myself to go out with all my friends who is still in kuching and is free to hang out.. (Laughs!.. HANG??).. man.. the words tht i use.. anyway.. ysterday some of my friends and I went out around kuching.. LITERALLY!!!..
1) Sarawak plaza.. town area..4pm
2) Spring.. 6pm..
3) Dinner at Secrect Garden..Padungan area..(nt so secrect anymore) 7pm..
4) went to (***** **** park)..cant say wht we call this park..haha(inside joke).He lives nerby(hint)
5) Airport.. 8pm..
6) friendship park!..9pm
7) Great idea!.. Drve to Damai!!!.. (shock)!!! at 10:00pm..
8) Manage to peek into Damai Puri.. Hahaha.. not telling hw.. 10:55pm
9) Manage to walk into Damai Beach.. use the toilet and go to the beach!! 11:10pm..
10) lastly sending them all back.. went home at about 12:55pm.. think abt it.. in record time??

hahaha.. OH man.. the random things tht we do just to kill time and make memories.. oh.. before tht i met up with Grace for lunch.. and talk alot.. then today i met up with Suzanne for lunch.. so anyone free to hang..(there i go again).. call me.. Im waiting for Bel, Sarala, Meru, Fateen, Esme and lots more..come on.. Peace!

wanting a meal..

You may think this picture is probably some other picture u will see on magazines promoting awareness in the world's poverty.. U may think so.. but there is a Story behind this unbelieveable picture..

this photograh is showing a starving Sudanese child being stalkked by a vulture won Kelvin Carter the 1994 Pulitzer Prize for feature photograhy..

the story behind this picture was incredible which made a great impact to the world.. Sadly, Kelvin Carter commited SUICIDE after receiving the award.. when he was interviewed by The New York Times.. he admited tht he didnt do much to tht baby..he just tried to chase the vulture away.. after taking the photo he sat under a tree and light a cigarette.. when ask why didnt he do more??.. Kelvin just answered.. this was just one photo among thousands of starving children around tht area!!!... OH MAn.. think about it.. no wonder he when through depression.. tht was just one shot.. and wont an award..imagine if he took more photos of other children..

now thinking about wht he just said made me think.. Carter chose to be an observer rather than a participant.. I dont want tht in my life.. God made a reason for us here on earth to help those in need.. I want to be able to be use by God..

ps: I believe God has a pupose for everything.. It wasnt by chance You came by to read this post.. there must be a reason somewhere.. Listen to God.. and do his will.. it can be anything like just helping out a friend or cooking for somebody.. believe me.. God wants to use u..

Something to think about..

Before u start reading..look at the picture carefully...the rain is like our sins.. and God is like the window wiper.. No matter how we keep on sining.. God will always..(like the wipers).. wipe it away and forgives us.. when we come to Him and ask for forgivness.. wht an awesome God.. =D

BEEN BUsy..

hie! soory for not updating for sooo long.. lets see.. i've been busy.. lets see.. In feb.. OH! I gratuated From ICCTS.. actually I wrote a long post abt it.. but i accidentally deleted it.. so.. I'm malas to write it again.. myb someday.. I miss all 6 of them at the momment.. Oh! i went to Perth with manda, my dad and my step mum during the chinese new yr.. no! nt for holiday but to send manda off to study.. yup! Had a wonderful experience while I was there.. instead of the usual Kanggaroo story u would hear abt Australia.. I would tell u a different story about my trip with my Family.. it was more abt Spiritual growth.. haha.. (KINGS PARK)..haha..meet up with Jer there too..haha.. had to pass to her, her ang pau and calculator!!! oh! and on the 20th of Feb was my Birthday.. haha.. like wht all the msges i get ppl telling me.. 18 and LEGAL!!.. haha.. thn i would reply.. LEGAL TO WHT???.. hahaha.. i dont need happiness frm a bottle.. but nevertheless.. Thank you everyone for wishing me and even remembering my Bday.. Thanks for the phone call DEB, Drey and Pat.. thanks for the present Manda,lilian, jasmine,Grace, Ps cheli and Auntie mei.. Thanks for the lasksa Oguchi and Simon.. Thanks everyone for the msges.. I try to reply each msg whether in Friendster or Hp.. i really apprieciate it.. well thts all for now..

Graduation..

photo taken in www.bethanyyouthcc.org (simon,Janna,Me,Manda,Leslie,Oguchi and Sam)


The time has finally come.. for me and the rest of the 6 in ICCTS.. to Graduate.. My feeling towards the Graduation is both Happy and sad. I am gald tht i went through this programme?-Course?-School?- soul searching moment-whatever you call it.. for the pass 4 weeks.. Im glad its over because I cant wait to use all tht I'have learn and put it to good use in Glorifying God's Kindom.. but I am also sad because I will really miss all the Fun times spend with the rest in tht little house of ours.. each one of them have impacted me in different ways..

I'll miss Janna's laugh and all the Nz stories, Amanda and her random hyperness and imitating Oguchi.. haha, I'll miss Oguchi 's funny face expression and the way he bully Amanda back..HAHA!.. I'll miss the way Sam is sooo blur asking WHAT? WHAT WHAT? haha.. and bullying me because I claim he is my BOSS.. I'll miss Leslie's jokes, and also the the conversation between him and Janna always makes us laugh the hardest because of the misunderstanding in almost everything.. and I'll miss Simon for his AUNTIE-NESS (if there is such word) haha.. always making sure tht we have enough food to eat and ( i hate to admit it) his lameness.. U get it? u get it?..haha.. OH! I'll also miss Pastor NED.. for all his Stories and Teachings... U Rock Ps.NED!

Anyway the Graduation went well, Leslie and I were Mc for the night.. so the programme went like this.. at 6pm all the graduate and their family members had a speacial dinner at first before the ceremony began at Bethany Centre .. Elly came as my representative.. because my sisters couldnt make it.. after tht at about 7pm the ppl from Bethany youth started coming in and so the ceremony kicked off with a video presentation.. then testimonies(but we call it the secrect life of Iccts) by Simon and Janna, after tht we had a Drama tittle umbrella acted out by Amanda and Sam.. I did the summary of the Drama.. next it was Leslie and Sam's turn to testify hw great Iccts has impacted us.. then another Video Presentation of our Trip to kampung pasir ulu.. lastly it was Amanda, Me and Oguchi to tell our side of the stories.. all and all we graduated with two Certificate.. one for the Kairos course and One for ICCTS.. we finally we wrap up with praise and worship songs.. tht night i sang my heart out and for the 1st time in a very long time.. I felt at peace and soo much joy singing praises to God..

HoW Iccts had impacted me is.. I learn to be disciplin in reading the bible, I found myself praying more often,I worry less because I know God has a purpose for me where ever i go.. I feel like in any way tht God wants to use me I am Ready to help ou! It has also challenge me to over come my Laziness in preparing myself for devoutional..especially in the Kampung trip.. I had to speak for the SUNDAY SERVICE in BAHASA MELAYU! oh Man.. tht really put me on the spot having to step out of my comfort zone.. but all went well.. and i can say im happy .. I would encourage the next bacth to enjoy themselves and to come without any BIG expectation and you'll be ready to take on the challenge